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Friday, March 05, 2004

Teardrop Poised on Edge of Jesus' Eye; Ready to Fall if Hatch Keeps Moving Lips 


Their faces tell the whole story, in a way.
GOP Aides Implicated In Memo Downloads
Democrats' Files Accessed and Leaked In Security Breach

A three-month investigation by the Senate's top law enforcement officer found a systematic downloading of thousands of Democratic computer files by Republican staffers over the past few years as well as serious flaws in the chamber's computer security system.
And while Pat Leahy said in the press briefing yesterday that he believes the actions were criminal (yeah, I guess it wouldn't be going too far to say the theft of 4,670 documents might warrant a charge or two), Orrin Hatch still insists that they were merely "unethical." Now, Orrin--



--yes now, L'il Orrin, we remember what happens when we lie, don't we? When Orrin doesn't tell the whole truth, because it might make him unpopular with his friends? When Orrin's a bad, bad boy?


"That's right, Orrin. I weep."

Oh, and this a bit of absolute pure-gold shamelessness:
In a statement e-mailed to reporters, Miranda [one of the two accused staffers] said the report "fails to find any criminal hacking or credible suggestion of criminal acts," and called on Hatch to investigate the substance of the Democratic memos. He accused Pickle [the Senate Sergeant-at-Arms] of having "acted improperly toward me from the first day I met with the investigators."
Mean Pickle. Hatch, do the right thing, and get to the bottom of what's in those memos that is so sinister and transgressive it compelled these two fine young men to hack them!


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