Saturday, July 10, 2004

Kristof: Laff Riot 

Dear Nicholas Kristof,

Your recent column is about as funny as a four-year-old contracting cancer of the eye. Apparently, you think fascism is funny. You don't give a shit. You've "succeeded"--your reputation is established, your career complete. You can write columns on the level of a seventh-grader writing "satire" for the middle school newspaper. You could even die. Nothing matters to you anymore. "Matter" is a pretense. Make no mistake: publishing photographs of starving Sudanese or accounts of your heroic maneuvers in Southeast Asian whore-markets won't absolve you of your essential mediocrity, foolishness, and worthlessness. You should quit. A "conservative" or right-wing columnist would be preferable to you. You suck, and aren't funny. You really do want Bush to be elected. Electoral politics titillates you. Having "the bad guy" in office titillates you. It's all pageantry--you might as well write about runway fashions (although that would almost certainly be over your head) or reality television shows. You're a talentless narcissistic fuck. Your overripe ego keeps you hanging on by a thread: but all around, for you, is oblivion. Drop now.

Eat shit,



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