Friday, August 27, 2004

McCain Puzzle Solved 

I think I figured it out. If I remember correctly, the core of the 2000 smear campaign against John McCain was spreading the word that he was crazier than a shithouse rat. (Yes, there was the stuff about his adopted Bangaladeshi child being his own illegitimate child, McCain being gay, McCain being black, etc.--but I think the main smear was the crazier-than-a-shithouse-rat innuendo.)

So, we're all wondering how this man could have so little honor and integrity as to be gleefully licking the asshole of Bush, the man who smeared him and his family, even as he (Bush) presently heads smears against McCain's fellow veteran Kerry. How could he be doing this? How could the man be associating himself with such disrace, such filth?

I think it is because McCain is crazier than a shithouse rat. You see, in light of that fact, the smear of 2000 wouldn't really be a smear--it would be an announcment of fact, namely, that McCain's unfortunate years of torture at the hands of the Viet Cong rendered him, well, at least as crazy, if not crazier, than a shithouse rat.

So there was no offense taken. So now McCain is free to join Prince Shitface in smearing his fellow veteran Kerry, because he bears no grudge, and is in fact nuts, and is pissed, perhaps, that Kerry's wounds didn't make him nuts. Wouldn't you be pissed if the enemy made you nuts and the other guy got off with some shrapnel in the leg?

So there you have it. QED. Permission to reprint granted.


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