I hereby nominate Raymond Jackson for President in 2008. He is the ideal Republican, the quintessential compassionate conservative and defender of the family.

Those of you in NY may remember this crazy ass story from about a year ago:

New Jersey Couple Held in Abuse; One Son, 19, Weighed 45 Pounds

Published: October 27, 2003
COLLINGSWOOD, N.J., Oct. 26 — The parents of four boys adopted from New Jersey's troubled foster care system were arrested Friday, two weeks after the police found that the children, ages 9 to 19, had been starved to the point that none of them weighed more than 50 pounds, according to the Camden County prosecutor.

The boys were so badly malnourished that their shriveled bodies gave no hint of their ages, investigators said. At 19, the oldest was 4 feet tall and weighed 45 pounds. The police initially thought he was just 10 years old. The boys' condition was discovered when a neighbor called the police because the 19-year-old, Bruce, was looking for food in the neighbor's trash at 2:30 a.m. on Oct. 10, according to the county prosecutor, Vincent P. Sarubbi. The boys were removed from the home later that day.

Well, this zany bunch is back in the news again,because the parents have "broken their silence" and decided to "speak out":

Couple Accused of Starving Sons Speak Out

NEW YORK (AP) -- A couple charged with starving their four adopted sons contends the boys starved themselves, telling a magazine the oldest boy lied to authorities about conditions in the family's home.

Raymond and Vanessa Jackson broke their 13-month silence to talk with a reporter from New York magazine about the case. They are awaiting trial on charges of aggravated assault and child endangerment.
...

Raymond Jackson, 51, said the teen misled investigators.

``I know Bruce loves us,'' Raymond Jackson, 51, told the magazine for this week's issue. ``I know he does. But sometimes I think about how my life is completely turned around. And it's because he told a lie. He told a lie on me. He told a lie on us.''

Indeed.

The least surprising thing about this story, however, can be found in the earlier article:

The evangelical church attended by the Jacksons, who are born-again Christians, is in Medford, about 20 miles away. Congregation members said they could not imagine that the Jacksons had starved their sons.

"There is no way on God's green earth that this happened," said Frank Jacobs, 50, a member of the Medford congregation, the Come Alive New Testament Church, who said he has known the family for 15 years. He said the children were lively and active members of the church, attending Sunday school, acting in pageants and singing.

That's right: the Jacksons are "born-again Christians"! And one of the perks of being an evangelical is that you are free to simply deny reality when reality contradicts your beliefs!

Well, the thing is, when the kids weren't "acting and pageants and singing" their lifestyle wasn't, so to speak, "lively":

Authorities said the couple kept the boys from eating, and at points the children subsisted on pancake batter and gnawed on wallboard.

Can I get a Amen?

One boy, a 14-year-old identified only by his initials, K. J., weighed 38 pounds when the Jacksons adopted him in 1996. When he was removed from their home on Oct. 10, he was 4 feet tall and weighed just 40 pounds, Mr. Sarubbi said.

Praise Jesus! Praise Him!

My only question: was it the gays, the abortionists, the feminists, the ACLU, or the wine-sipping eastern elites who have so degraded our venerable tradition of family-based moral values that young Bruce was driven to "tell a lie on us"?

My only other question: will Bruce repent for his lies?